My Dear Scott

Today marks the 6 month point since we shared our time with Scott. I honestly can't believe that it has been 6 months. I often think of the milestones he would be reaching, and what he would be like. I have to admit that I have been thinking of him quite a bit lately, and a bit more emotional too. Oh well, I can't help it. I try to fight the feelings and emotions as I listen to beautiful talks, and music but it only makes me more emotional. It is good to let the tears roll every now and then.

I was reading my friends blog, and she had posted a beautiful poem she had received. She too lost her son a week before Scott. I would like to post the poem here as well, as I think it brings so much comfort and hope.

It is called "The White Rose"
All the earth's mothers were gathered together at God's garden of flowers. Those beautiful budding spirits, who would someday come to earth, were nurtured and tended in the garden. A loving Father spoke to the mother: "See the works of My hands, someday you will be the mothers to these radiant spirits."

The garden glowed with the mixture of all kinds and colors. "Choose ye," He said. Now in the east corner of the garden pure white roses stood as sentinels. They were not as colorful as the rest, but glowed with a kind of purity which set them apart. One by one the mothers stepped forward. "I want the blue-eyed, brown haired boy, full of life and love who would someday be a prince in a grand country."

The garden buzzed with excitement as the others chose their own special spirits, those whom they would soon welcome into the warmth and love of earthly home.

Once again the loving Father spoke, "But who will take the white roses, the ones in the east corner of the garden? These will return to me in purity and goodness, they will not stay long in your home, for I must bring them back to my Garden for they belong to me, but they will gain bodies as was planned. you will miss them and long for them, but I will personally care for them."

"No, not I," many said in unison. "I could not bear to give one back so soon." "Nor I," said the others, "We will take those who will remain and grow to maturity and live long lives."
The loving Father looked out across the multitude of mothers with a longing in His eyes for someone to step forward. Silence. Then He said, "See the most pure and perfect of all the white ones? I chose Him.

He will go down and be a sacrifice for all mankind. He will be scorned, mocked and crucified. He is mine own. Will not anyone choose like unto Him?"A few mothers stepped forward. "Yes, Lord, I will." Then another, " I as well," "Yes, Lord we will." Soon all the pure white roses were taken and they rejoiced in the choices of the mothers. The Father spoke again, "Oh, how blessed are you who chose the white roses, for your pain will be a heavy cross to bear, but your joy will be exceeding beyond anything you can understand at this time."

The white ones embraced their mothers, and so full was their purity and love that it filled their souls with such endearment. Each mother knew they could endure the task. And the greatest of all the white ones, gathered them as a hen gathers her chicks, and the outpouring of love surrounded each mother and child, consuming all the white ones as He prepared them for their task. And each Mother who bore the weight of the 'White Rose,' would feel the overwhelming love of God, as they all shouted, "Thy will be done."

When imagining how your life is going to be I don't think any mother or father thinks to themselves that they are going to have a child die so soon. Most of us would rather imagine a happy ever after ending with no trials and no difficulty. Realistically none of us will have a life without trials. We have been given the opportunity to choose. Philip and I chose our children and the blessings and hardships that come with each. We will have a happy ever after ending, and I can't wait. It will be so nice to once again hold my son, and just enjoy his presence.